Every month I perform a monodialogs® on the subway: a repertoire of mobile phone conversations culled from reality. Putting my finger to my ear (no one will look closely to discover I have no phone) I produce pithy and topical urbane conversations. When my audience ignores me I know I am a success.

May 15, 2011

Anatomy of an Encounter: I Could Be Wrong

I thought the facts made me right. Image by spelio As I stood in a long line at the ATM outside my bank I smelled smoke. It came and went and, after a while I started to look around…

December 12, 2009

Flattery Will Get You Everywhere

For the last year I’ve been getting email newsletters from the dealership where I bought my car. Although my Volkswagen is over nine years old the dealer wants to keep in touch with me. Naturally, they want to keep me…

July 14, 2007

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 13

As she boarded the Orange Line train for the burbs she sat down and immediately opened her David’s Bridal catalogue. Ever on the lookout for my next episode of The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, I surreptitiously observed her…

April 23, 2007

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 12

Monday morning commutes, by almost unanimous vote, are reserved for quiet transitions from the weekend to the work week ahead. So when riding the subway this morning I and those around me were jarred by a gentleman bellowing into his…

March 4, 2007

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 11

I’d just run into Steny Hoyer, the Democratic Majority Leader, on the street the day before. Stealing a few extra creative minutes on my commute to work, I had pulled out my Moleskin to pen a few notes about the…

July 14, 2006

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 10

Hot town, summer in the city Back of my neck getting dirty and gritty Been down, isn’t it a pity Doesn’t seem to be a shadow in the city Summer in the City The Lovin’ Spoonful It’s turning out…

February 24, 2006

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 9

You can’t hear me? I CAN HEAR YOU!Yes I can. Brenda, I am on the subway. I can’t be doing that! When people make public spectacles of themselves I get embarrassed. Why me? Watching a scorned lover let her…

December 18, 2005

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 8

Amber, this is Glenn I’m in the Metro on my way in I need an email to go out now! . An early morning snow had forced the federal government to open two hours late. The respite from AM…

November 20, 2005

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 7

Hi Nick. This is your lawyer. Your lawyer, Bob. Yes, that’s right. Your lawyer. Washington is a town of lawyers. They’re everywhere and into everything. Their influence is clearly visible throughout the DC area. Button-down blue Oxford dress shirts…

December 11, 2004

The Sociology of Close Contact Technology:
Taking Back Your Public Space

Download these handy dandy cards,perfect for any overbearing cell phone interaction I am a voyeur. To be a good artist you must be willing to observe and listen. It’s not hard when you take public transportation every day. As…

October 30, 2004

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 6

It’s been an intense week. The election polls are bouncing all over the place. Osama, through his privately funded 527 Organization broadcasts his own election ad. And a bunch of ragged federal workers make their way home on the…

September 25, 2004

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 5

After a brief hiatus, we open a new season of The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable. With the change in seasons comes the desire for change. Based on an overheard cell conversation this week on the subway I…

March 22, 2004

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 4

In this month’s Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable office politics meets low carb but tasty recipes. March madness: cell phone monodialogues® from the subway underground: We’ve got to nail this guy! If we don’t we’ll be knockin’ on…

February 7, 2004

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 3

In this month’s performance from the acclaimed Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable—monodialogue® cell phone performances from the Washington subway—showbiz lobbies for better government. Ladies and Gentlemen, The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 3: What’s up? I…

January 22, 2004

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 2

Last month, after a particularly grueling day at work I founded The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable. Each month I would perform underground cell phone conversation tableaus to the apathetic minions riding DC’s subway system, the Metro. The…

December 20, 2003

The Theatre of the Barely Socially Acceptable, Act 1

After a particularly difficult and emotionally heart wrenching day at work (is there no other kind?) I was listening to my iPod’s special “Get Over It” mix on the subway home, prepared especially for days like this. While undoing…