11 Aug China: Good Kitsch is Dead, Long Live My Good Kitsch

During June and July 2013 my wife and I took our children, both born in China, back to see where they came from. It was an incredible trip for all of us. For my children it made a very abstract part of their lives real. For my wife and I it completed a circle we began in 1997. This is the second post in a series of stories about our trip. But if you know me, you’ll know I’m attracted to the fringes of any narrative. That’s where the memories are. I won’t be giving any interminably long and boring slide shows of the trip but if you want to take a look at some of the photographs I took, feel free to do so in the comfort of your own Internet café.

Finding more of this good kitsch was my quest. Click on image for a larger, more amazing view.

Finding more of this good kitsch was my quest. Click on image for a larger, more amazing view.

Just before our recent trip to China I waxed poetic about a Chinese treasure I brought back from the Middle Kingdom the last time we were there. My Chinese bodybuilder statuette was the perfect embodiment of good kitsch and I was hoping to find its long lost relatives on this trip. So I brought a photo of the figure with me, eager to show it to any shopkeeper I was forced to encounter. Amazingly, this didn’t happen until we got to Guangzhou, about two-thirds through our journey.

With each arrival to a new city we were introduced to a new tour guide. Up until Guangzhou we were with a group but this time we had our guide all to ourselves: Jerry. Jerry was not his real name, nor were Emily, Lily, or David the English names of our other guides. No subterfuge intended, everyone who works in the Chinese travel industry takes on a Western name. It’s easier for travelers to remember. Jerry was hard to forget.

When we first climbed into our Dongfeng minivan, Jerry introduced us to our driver, Tom. “You know,” he said, “we’re like Tom and Jerry.” A sense of humor I could appreciate; we’d get along just fine. And, in fact, this encouraged me to share my quest with Tom and Jerry. As soon as we strapped ourselves in, I got out my iPhone and showed Jerry my ceramic he-man. “I’m looking for more of these,” I said. Not surprisingly, he laughed. I explained its history and how important it was to find good kitsch. “Do you know what kitsch is?” He wasn’t sure. “You know, souvenirs that are so bad they’re good,” I replied. “There’s bad kitsch and there’s good kitsch. Bad kitsch is so bad it’s, well, just bad. But if you push a bit harder it can be so bad it’s good.” Considering this convoluted mindset was conveyed in English, I was gratified he got the nuanced gist. “Yes,” he said. “So bad it’s good!” We were going to get along just fine.

As we traversed Guangzhou that day he’d stop in front of a shop and say “Bad kitsch.” Yes, his training was almost complete. And as we left the famous Ancestral Home of the Chen Family in the center of the city Jerry announced “It’s time to go to a Friendship store.” Friendship stores were built in the 1950s to sell souvenirs and Western items to foreigners. By the time we first traveled to China in the late 1990s they had become forced stops for tourists who wanted to bring home “authentic” crafts, jade, and pearls. It was in one of these stores I found my ceramic man. Boy, was I excited.

But, Jerry warned me. “I don’t think you’ll find what you’re looking for. Now they sell only high price Gucci bags and other famous brands. They’re catering to Western tastes.” Well, not this Westerner’s tastes. Why go to China to buy something you could get at home? We entered the store and Jerry introduced me to one of the salesladies. I pulled out my phone and, with Jerry translating my story, showed the woman my figurine. “I’m looking for these,” I said.

“What?! You’re kidding me.” I think that’s how Jerry translated it.

Well, she started to laugh. “No, I’m serious.” She laughed even harder. I went to the next woman and repeated my quest. The look on her face says it all. Like the Ming Dynasty, the Golden Age of Chinese Tchotchkes was no more. And I had to settle for a terra cotta soldier reproduction instead.

When traveling to exotic places historic souvenirs are nice; but there’s nothing like finding good kitsch for that perfect memory.

Related posts: Read other stories about our trip back home to China.