Fairly Odd Parents-Present / 27.08.2006

View of the beach from our balcony through out the day.

With time on my hands I photographed the seashore from our condo's balcony throughout the day.

I was looking forward to our Vacation About Nothing: a week at the beach. When I meditate (I'm quite the novice), the vision I grab is one of me laying on a huge blanket next to the ocean water, the sound of the waves taking me to "my other place." My sister-in-law recently loaned me her white noise machine, which included a wave sound, but it just didn't cut it. There is nothing like the real thing. And I was so looking forward to it.

Spending a few days at the New Jersey shore has become a tradition in our family. For the past five years we've spent 4 days and 3 nights at the Bal Harbour Motel in Wildwood Crest, New Jersey. But this year we decided to try something a little different. After scouring the Web and Google Earth we rented a condo right across from our old hotel. Instead of a few days at the shore we'd have a week. We were filled with anticipation. Sight unseen (except for a satellite view) we arrived at our place, a half block from the beach with a full balcony view of the ocean. We were most pleased.

View of the beach from our balcony through out the day.

My girls had their own room. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law had their own room, as did my wife and me. The view was spectacular and the accommodations and amenities luxurious compared to our old digs across the street. I was ready for some serious R & R where I would immerse myself in another world, free of stress. Total relaxation in order to recharge your batteries for the rest of the year: isn't that what these beach trips are about?

Yes, in my dreams and deep meditative states. While the trip was indeed relaxing I can tell you with authority that it's hard, no impossible to completely eliminate the outside world. Nothing is perfect, not even that perfect beach trip.

But like the true Type A that I am, I've come home and created a balance sheet that outlines those things that could keep me up at night verses those that put me to sleep. Borrowing from Wired Magazine's monthly Wired/Tired/Expired comparison chart for the latest memes, I offer you my own (Just a Little) Wired/Tired (But Relaxed) list:

Medicinal Properties / 07.08.2006

Stay away from sledgehammers. One minute I was minding my own business and the next I had a fever and chills. I'm now going on Day 5 of this routine. Ok Go's Here We Go Again cured me. Depressing as being sick can be, being so sick that all you want to do, all you can do is watch TV can lead to complications. Even with cable, searching for a good movie that will transport you to some sunny beach on the Riviera is hard to find. It must have been "Incarcerated Movie Week" on Turner Movie Classics --1930s penitentiaries and angry...

Idiosyncratic Celebrations, News Outta My Control / 29.07.2006

Hooper ya idiot. Starboard. Ain't you watchin' it? Quinn, from Jaws Killer hurricanes. Massive floods. Record heat waves. Earthquakes. Tsunamis. And now this. Huge sea creatures attacking high rise buildings in the burbs of our nation's capital. This isn't just another summertime assault by a Great White; it's an attack of the great GREAT BIG white shark. A 1950s B sci-fi flick? The result of global warming? Al Gore must be snickering "I told you so!" Wait. It's Shark Week and Discovery Channel's worldwide headquarters just outside DC has been eaten alive by a big fish. I was there --those teeth are...

Fairly Odd Parents-Present / 22.07.2006

Prologue

What a fun time Urania, the Muse of Astrology has been having with me lately. I don't normally subscribe to the heavens' effect on humanity but when Mercury is in retrograde I take note.

As a rule, retrograde planets presage a period of seemingly inevitable or fated events, which relate to their sphere of influence. They present us with a series of events over which we seem to have little or no control...

This is a long tale. Sit down, relax, and be prepared to acknowledge the power of the stars.


The Look

Alan Cumming wears my look

I discovered Alan Cumming (right) was wearing "my look."

I'm a casual kind of guy. Polo shirts hanging out, a pair a jeans, and my sandals are my usual togs du jour. But lately for business reasons I've been toning up my dress: a pair of nice Italian slacks here, a bouclé sportscoat there. When I need to I want to dress for success. But my everyday clothes have remained the same casual style.

I've been pretty oblivious to nice casual. I have many pairs of jeans but only one pair of khakis. I tend towards the iconoclastic in most of my life but when it comes to clothes (particularly pants) I have been uninspired, that is until I saw The Look.

A couple of weeks ago I opened the style section of the Washington Post to an article on menswear designers. Appearing in the print edition (but not online) was a photograph of actor Alan Cumming wearing a pair of Converse All-Stars with a pair of light pants. That, I decided, was my look. Armed with my photo I went about the task of reinventing myself (let it be known, periods of retrograde are times to redo things: reread good books, revise articles you are writing, and, of course reinvent).

Barely Socially Acceptable / 14.07.2006

Hot town, summer in the city Back of my neck getting dirty and gritty Been down, isn't it a pity Doesn't seem to be a shadow in the city Summer in the City The Lovin' Spoonful It's turning out to be a typical Washington summer: hot and very humid. I know. Last night our air conditioning simply quit. No announcement; no nothing. One minute I was nice and comfy and the next my skin stopped breathing. I knew what was coming. As the evening wore on I could feel myself getting more and more uncomfortable. When it gets this hot it's torture and people say things...

Idiosyncratic Celebrations / 10.07.2006

An idyllic birthday from my past (that's me on the left). My birthday approaches. And as it gets closer I must find a set of goodies to suggest when my family asks: "Daddy/Husband/Favorite Son-in-Law, what would you like for your birthday?" A set of techno toys is lust-worthy, but iconoclastic presents are always nice. I am, after all, a good gift giver so that makes me a very, very difficult gift receiver. I think: I alone know what I want. Oh, the hubris. So, what do I want? I scour the Web looking for something I just must have. And I scan....

Worker's Comp / 30.06.2006

The Patent Office Building, which houses the Smithsonian American Art Museum and the National Portrait Gallery, is about to receive visitors. After a six and one-half year hiatus for renovations, the Smithsonian American Art Museum reopens tomorrow. As a personal benchmark, my oldest daughter, now almost 10, was just a wee three when we closed in January 2000. A lot has changed both at home and in the museum. In the days leading up to the opening festivities we've been blogging up a storm over at Eye Level including this slide show of pics from our pre-opening Gala. Thanks for...

Commuting with Nature / 26.06.2006

Sardines. Every morning subway commuters are packed into overcrowded tins like generic and anonymous fish. The only way out of these cans is through three small doors. And by the time I'm ready for my exit there's almost no way out. I'm lucky. I get on at the beginning of the subway line so I can usually sit close to the egress. This gives me a front row seat as human nature typically unfolds; when people get on the train they mass at the exits rather than moving out of the way towards the center of the car. The closer...

Idiosyncratic Celebrations, News Outta My Control / 17.06.2006

Stewie Griffin and Arnold: fitting namesakes for our American football. It's the World Cup and EVERYBODY has football fever. Everybody but Americans. Ok, not all Americans. Everybody south of our soon-to-be fortified US-Mexican border is glued to their TV. The rest of us are carrying on our lives as we always do --waiting for our football season to start in the Fall. We live Saul Steinberg lives: there is the US and then there is the rest of the world. We've got miles and feet; the rest of the globe has kilometers and meters. We've got gallons and quarts; you've...